Why Do Children "Misbehave"? |
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All children act in annoying, obnoxious, or hurtful ways at times, and they don't always cooperate with our requests. Before dealing with inappropriate behavior in children, it is useful to know why they act the way they do. Once we know this, it is easier to be effective problem-solvers. We can explain almost all unacceptable behavior in children by one of the following three factors... |
Understanding Tears and Tantrums |
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Confusion about crying
Many parents find it hard to understand and accept their children's tears and tantrums, and are confused by contradictory advice they have read. On one hand, much of the advice in parenting books is based on the assumption that crying and temper tantrums are behaviors that should be discouraged... |
Crying for Comfort: Distressed Babies Need to be Held |
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The Harmful Cry-It-Out Approach
The term "cry it out" refers to the practice of leaving babies in their cribs without picking them up, and letting them cry themselves to sleep. A modified version of this approach is to go to the baby every few minutes to pat her on the back or reassure her verbally (but not pick the baby up), and to increase the length of time gradually so that the baby eventually "learns" to fall asleep alone... |
What to do when your baby cries |
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A crying baby is a source of concern for many parents. When your baby cries and you don't know why, it can bring up feelings in you of anxiety, helplessness, frustration, incompetence, and even anger and hostility. There is much advice about crying babies, but most of it fails to explain the real reasons for crying, and offers suggestions that are damaging to your baby's emotional development... |
The Crying-in-arms Approach for Helping Babies Sleep Through the Night |
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The problem of night waking
The problem of night waking ranks high on the list of parents who consult with me. In a typical scenario, the mother has co-slept and nursed her baby on demand from birth on. She has started the baby on solid foods, but feels dismayed and perplexed when he continues to awaken at night wanting to nurse... |
Don't spank your children: Ten reasons to avoid corporal punishment |
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- Corporal punishment can lead to aggressive behavior.
Children who are spanked are more likely to hit and bite other children, become playground bullies, and have violent outbursts as adults.
- Corporal punishment can lead to rebellion.
Children who are spanked are more likely to rebel against their parents and engage in risky behaviors...
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The 10 principles of Aware Parenting |
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- Aware parents fill their children's needs for physical contact (holding, cuddling, etc.). They do not worry about "spoiling" their children.
- Aware parents accept the entire range of emotions and listen non-judgmentally to children's expressions of feelings. They realize that they...
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